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Darkness Of The Orbit-a short prologue(Fanfiction)

Discussion in 'Official Forum Games' started by JaMushI, Sep 30, 2019.

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  1. JaMushI

    JaMushI Forum-Greenhorn

    It may sound bland to read such a term, especially because most people in their younghood always dreamed space was a new frontier to reach and create better new colonies for humanity to move into.
    we always dreamed to create majestic and advanced cities into space....it is human desire, ever since our first days of being nomads across the earth, and only ten thousand years or so, we began settling in our own chosen locations, and began developing agrarian technologies which made humanity leap a step forward, from the stone ages, where we lived in houses shaped in the rock and mountains, and survival was always a requisition, and the law of the strongest abides. if you didn't run hundred or dozen of miles a day, running after mammoths, you were a prominent failure, and undeserving of having a great meal afterwards, yes, survival was always a necessity like building tents to cover from the cold, using elephant horns, or gathering food for the village, if you were a woman at that time and place, or even hunting for fish.
    fast forwarding a few thousand years, humans have become reliant on most technologies, to complete 90% of task. for farmers, of the great american praires, the tractor and harvesters were big relief for most of the field work, for people of the urban areas, trains and airliners and trucks to transport goods to commercial businesses, which people of the suburbs and inner cities, could depend on for getting most of their needs fulfilled by the end of their 9 to 5 lifestyles. wear a suit and go work in a cubicle for ten hours writing pages for a newspaper company, now online, because hardly anyone read those anymore, at least younger generations.
    we have created much comfort and technology, and some of us get the easy jobs, so to speak, in retail stores or just simply your fast food around the corner, or working as a barista for some starbucks or european coffee shop, and simply lightning a cigarette with a coffee and go to work.
    eat, rinse repeat, and build your own business wether you're a realtor, cubicle worker, fast food drive thru speaker, or an employee of a big supernational business like the NASA, a company founded in 69, which has been renowkned to send humans into space. bad idea for us.
    which is why we are sitting in a rotting spacecraft in a section of space, no one ever heard before, but goes by the name or section ''5-1-3'' discovered by a lonesome satellite in an expedition, and was never found again. humans on earth probably have it easy.
    ''state of the art technology'' the Vengeance, was supposed to be the fastest spacecraft, available ever since they began building spacecrafts. it was designed to hold three lasers on top,
    with a collection of rocket launchers on each side, to prevent any UFO interference.
    it did had, excellent speed when upgraded with some special materials, one, kind of liquid substance called ''promerium'' which was meant to be inserted in the cabin laboratory, then transferred to the engines and propulsors...and which we were not allowed to use on this mission, for regulation and time restrictions.
    ''You call this fast? a snail is a Ferrari in comparison!'' i said as i looked at the different clocks present in the cabin. this was truly the oldest models, whereas the others, had computers settings. we did have those, but were at least some thirty years old with coding letters. windows xp, would sound advanced in comparison.
    our crew members were probably smarter than the adage technology present on the ship.
    ''what are we doing in this part of space again?'' i asked as the time was going by and i could never truly tell day or night, being into outermost space and in a sector we never been before.
    Sr. Jamushi, the Captain of the spacecraft, a short man, with slingback hair and squared glasses, replied with a strong authorative tone, holding his hands behind his back, a wore a hat with the symbol of his victory:
    ''Our mission is a very particular mission,
    and requires alot of effort, we need to gather sepromium a very special material, a kind of oil if you must put it that way. it is needed for a matter of reasons, but the principal one is to fix biomes. if something is left, it can be used to increase our shield, and weaponry forces. am i missing something?'' he said with a distinct tone, rather intimidating tone which could rattle the ships, and send armies back home by using a loudspeaker.
    ''can this cranky carriage go a bit faster?'' i asked him with a scaredy cat tone. his answer would have surely thrown me off guard, but he replied with a short and calm attitude...not what i expected, but i really needed to ask.

    ''jimmy boy, the Vengeance is one of our most proficient and quickest ''carriages'' of outer space, it can circumnavigate the earth, in a matter of 30 seconds, from any angle. it can supersede the Goliath-X in speed and dexterity, and it's manual controls make it a manly challenge to defeat any debris on it's way. 20.000 clicks can be covered in a minute, 10.000.000 in perhaps...an hour? it is not in the best interest for our mission, to waste precious resources, for someone laziness and prepotence. you have been asked since we left earth, if you want to participate in this mission, and i'm sure your mother has agreed to let you take a vacation. in this very moment our mission is crucial: he began speaking with a louder and stronger tone:« we must pick 1500 of these special ROCKS, AND WE DO NOT KNOW WHAT IS AROUND THE CORNER, SO EITHER YOU GO TO SLEEP AND DEMOTE YOURSELF TO BASIC PILOT, OR YOU HELP YOUR BROTHERS IN EARTH, AND PICK THOSE SEPROMIUM, OR YOU'LL BE BACK IN THE ANTIX(PHOENIX FOR SIZE) AND MANAGE YOUR OWN SURVIVAL...AM I CLEAR, MISTER?» He said with one of the greatest and loudest tones, which could rattle and cause earthquakes around the earth-'' Yes Sir, i suppose i better get moving and working back on the mission, perhaps i take a rest and then work it out?''

    he squinted his eyes at me and then directed his attention toward one of my older brothers, who were also present in this mission: johnny boy, give your brother something to do, on the vengeance, other than sitting around and hitting a ball on the shielding and wreck our spaceship...will ya?'' he said while holding his left hardened hand on my left shoulder.

    johnny, my older brother, quite chubby, long hair till the shoulder and with a few pimples, and with a high degree in engineering, replied with a squint eye:«surely, commander in chief i offer to make sure my little brother jimmy becomes a man, and he will help me with some fissures in the engine sections, including placing liquid sepromium for better acceleration...grab this bag, and follow me down the stairs, will ya?» he said then directing my attention toward the bag he positioned next to my feet,similar to a golf ball container, but with wrenches and instruments of the kind.

    «make sure he sweats!» the commander said at last.
    ''smh'' i thought while holding the bag containing the wrenches, starting already to become tired before i got to the engine section.
    ''jimmy boy, come on help your brother will ya? » he said with a sarcastic tone. we arrived down to a place where supposedly the engine was meant to be, but we first stepped into the room where the special cargo was being held.

    the cargo was comprised of various rocks of an aqualike color, meant for the shielding and protection of biomes. ''Sepromium...what are we here for again?'' i asked my brother, who looked at me in the meanest of ways as if he were to whip me with a wrench for being extremely talkative-«i told you already...we must gather some rock and stack them aside.
    then we will transform them into liquid sepromium, where it is going to be use for both shield and biomes on the different colonies....at the end of the day if there is any remaining it will be used for the shield...comprende?» he told me again sarcastically.

    ''now help me with these rocks..you have good muscles, so you should use them..eh eh!'' he said as we begin moving rocks to the corners. it was packed, so much, that nothing was coming up or going down.

    this was going to be a long day..or night?

    i didn't know, as moving rocks, surely made time go fast...very fast!

    it was almost eight o clock, american east coast time.

    ''how many more we must place aside?'' i asked my brother. i was drenched in sweat from the heavy loading and separating and so on. i was hungry and i desperately needed a burger in new lunar horizon.

    new lunar horizon, is the colony where all our spaceships, are sent off. a massive city built to the core of the moon, and were only residents above a certain grade are sent to live for missions. too many and earth would suffer catacylism, as it would pull it to the earth.
    earth, NASA base, was then forgotten and left in hands of different organizations which used the base for their own means, including weaponry and chemical factories.
    it became a secondary launch base, in short.

    ''a few more rocks, and then after dinner some more work in fixing the machine for gathering resources, as it been having some issues...apparently. asap we're done, the earlier we can both sleep, and the commander, finish his job, so he can retire on earth. '' he told me as lied down on the rocks, catching a breath of air...where logistically it wasn't present.

    ''boy, these rocks are cooling...check them out.'' eventually i got up and started sitting on the rocks to rest my back. ''that was hard stuff...but i feel better and more productive now...and you're right about the rocks..they're indeed comfty.'' i thought as i laid myself to rest.

    not shortly after, a scream of terror, filled the air, and i was soon to know why.

    ''ahh ****..squish that m'fer!'' said my brother, as he held on his hand some kind of jellyfish look alike creature. i knew what happened. the jelatons, came up from the resource gatherer, and began taking over the cargo...or was it just breeding ground for them to recreate?

    we will find soon, on the second episode of ''darkness of the orbit''! keep yourself posted!
    Watt-Overlord and USA|Czerka like this.
  2. USA|Czerka

    USA|Czerka Forum-Apprentice

    Up until they released the Pusat, that ship is faster :p

    An excellent and entertaining read, you're on your way to become a professional fiction author! Just edge up your prose/grammar a bit; capitalize names and the beginning of each sentence, and maybe add names before the quotes so we can understand who is speaking easier.

    Looking forward to reading your sequel!
  3. JaMushI

    JaMushI Forum-Greenhorn

    i will surely finish it.
    this is mainly a prologue, but the main story is coming together!

    it will be action tensed and phased into episodes, where it's going to keep the reader chained to the story...follow up and join the quest in space!
  4. ZÿИΛPS™

    ZÿИΛPS™ Forum Commissioner

    This is a good story!
    However, you should proof read it and correct the errors.
  5. JaMushI

    JaMushI Forum-Greenhorn

    can you indicate me some of the mistakes, and how did you find the story so far?
    i've been writing some pages lately, and now almost into the fourth chapter, in case you're awaiting it!
    the story will contain puzzles, and will assume similarities to dead space series, so if you're confused just look it up!

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